1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
I wish I could be all optimistic and say despite everything bad that happened, yes, it was great. But in all honesty, it really was not. This has been a year full of emotional, psychological, and physical turmoil. It was unfortunately filled with negative energy, self-loathing and missed opportunities. This was also the first year I went an entire 365 days without writing.

2) What was your favorite moments of the year?
My two-year anniversary with Sean. Getting straight As in university, being in the top 5%, and getting scholarship money. Developing a love for cooking/baking. Seeing Bright Eyes in concert. Every conversation with onthetide.

3) What was your least favorite moments of the year?
Seeing my grandmother battle breast cancer. Going to my first funeral. The terrorist attacks. Turning twenty-one. Any and all problems with Sean. Finding out who Jason really is. Continuously fighting more and more with my father. Every drunken stunt my uncle pulled. Missing my mother. Not being able to write. The endless pity parties I threw for myself over my self-esteem, my SAD, my lack of friends. Queer As Folk coming to an end. Six Feet Under coming to an end.

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
I was in bed, on the phone long distance with onthetide, giggling like a schoolgirl over inside jokes and wavelength moments.

5) Who were you with?
Myself, my cats. My father was in the living room with my uncle.

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
Probably in bed again, with Sean (watching movies, that is). I hate New Years. I try to pretend it is not happening, hence the being in bed every year doing something completely unrelated to watching the ridiculous countdowns.

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
Sean. My cats. Again, with my father and uncle in the living room, I presume. We do nothing New Years eve, but our family has a dinner New Years day.

8) Did you keep your New Years resolution of 2005?
Time limits are only a set-up for failure. We make the same resolutions each January, so how about we stop making ourselves feel bad for not meeting those goals within a certain time period and simple keep a running To Do list?

9) Do you have a New Years resolution for 2006?
I just make long-term goals.

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
Continued to be in love, yes.

11) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005?
Yes, for a short period of time.

12) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
That has been my biggest downfall this year, I admit. I did try. I really did. But to no avail. I will continue trying again this coming year though. I miss having friends.

13) Who are your favorite new friends?
Erm, yeah, see above. However, I did make a few new online friends (you know who you are ♥).

14) What was your favorite month of 2005?
Hm. Probably October or November.

15) Did you travel outside of Canada in 2005?
Sadly, no.

16) How many different countries did you travel to in 2005?
None. But hey, I made some long distance calls. That should count for something!

17) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
I was not really close to the uncle who died, but yes. He was a good person.

18) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
I think a lot of people have come and gone this year, either friends or acquaintances. I am sure I missed a few people, yes. I miss some of my old friendships.

19) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
Probably The Enterpreter, The Woodsman or Closer (not all from 2005, I know). I honestly saw zero movies in the theatre this year, but I could put together a huge list of the best movies I saw when they came out on DVD or movies from previous years I saw for the first time in 2005. I definitely reaffirmed my filmwhore status this year, especially since I signed up with Zip.ca.

20) What was your favorite song from 2005?
Far too many to list. I listen to what I want, so my favourite song 'this year' would not necessarily be from 2005.

21) What was your favorite record from 2005?
Same deal here.

22) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
Just one. :P

23) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?
Just the one: Bright Eyes. It was an amazing show.

24) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005?
Seeing as I rarely drink, no. Mind you, I would say I had more drinks this year than previous ones (as in, four or five).

25) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
Lame. No.

26) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
Haven't we all? Yes. I would list those things but that might take a while... I will note that a lot of them have to do with my self-esteem though.

27) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
I really do not make a habit of lying to people, so I could not say.

28) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
Not intentionally. I got into a few tiffs with online friends but all has been worked out. I could have handled arguments with Sean better as well.

29) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
Ugh, Jason... so badly that we will never speak again. My father during various unforgettable incidents. The few offline friends I did have left also screwed me over when I needed them most, during the summer, so they are all gone too. Sean too, but that is something we are both working on, as I mentioned above.

30) How much money did you spend in 2005?
No more than I usually do. I think I have been smarter with my money this year, actually.

31) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
My grades from last semester. I still think they made some kind of mistake but hey. I also got $700 for those grades to help out with my tuition, so that was amazing too. Fluke or not, it made me happy.

32) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
I figure I am where I am for a reason. I hate thinking of having regrets, so I try not to have any. I am sure there were situations or arguments I would have dealt with differently, but the past is the past. I can only try harder this year.

33) What are your plans for 2006?
Just to change my life. I feel I am here but not really living. I want to work on my SAD, my self-esteem, and all things related. I would like to start therapy. I want to develop some good friendships, continue working hard in university, and hopefully figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. I really, really, really hope I can start writing again. As cliché as it is, I hope to start eating healthier and getting more exercise; I know ghostmeat will be there to inspire me. Most of all, I hope I can become a better person. I do not want to be unhappy with who I am. I also hope to keep the few relationships I do have strong and healthy, especially when it comes to Sean. I also hope to keep all of my online friendships because they mean more to me than most people would assume. I really need to learn to relax and find peace. I think that will be my main focus. That includes more sleep.